Most of us have difficulty saying “No!” The result of not saying “no” usually causes us to be involved in a lot of activities that give us no life and drain our energy. Life is demanding and people will always try to make their problems your problems, so learning to say “no” is important for your mental health—and physical health.
Many of us are not assertive enough to stand up for what is best for us and for your families. We let others convince us to do things that need not be our concern. What happens over time is we wear ourselves out and have no energy to take care of our own responsibilities. We over commit to others, activities, commitments for our children, and what ends up happening is that we don’t have time to focus on what is important in our lives. I hear people say all the time that they don’t have sufficient time to spent quiet time alone with God. It is hard to find time alone with God, if you life is packed with activities you shouldn’t be involved with anyway.
I encourage you to do the following activity: Take some time to sit down with a cup of coffee or tea and a notebook and start listing all the relationships that are energy drainers and activities and things you are involved in that add no value to your life. What do you simply need to say “no” to? Make a list of all the loose ends in your life—all the unfinished business that needs attention, but there is no time to attend to these issues. Maybe you are working and doing things that aren’t in your gifting, so the responsibility needs to go. I remember a few years I made a commitment to serve on a board of a foundation. I thought my involvement would be one thing only to spend a few months on the board and discovered that I needed a skill set I didn’t have. Nor did I care to have. I quit!! Take a look at your life and be honest about what needs to go. You will be so glad you made the decision to “just say no!”
Simplifying our lives includes learning to say “no!” Practice saying no and getting out of things you do not need to be involved in and find hours of time and renewed strength. Then go out and create YOUR life.
I have been guilty in the past of allowing others to convince me of what I should be doing. I’m learning to let God show me what He wants me to do, which then gives me the freedom to say “no” to other things. And I don’t apologize for it.