If you have children or grandchildren, you have had opportunities to experience the pain of “letting go”—so they can grow. My latest experience with “letting go” has been with my thirteen-year-old grandson who recently left home to attend an out-of-state military school. So here is our story!!
When he and his older brother were young, my husband and I had the privilege of taking care of them often. My daughter needed reprieve from the constant demands of young motherhood, and she and her husband traveled internationally during those early days, and I had the joy of keeping the boys for extended periods of time. As the years rolled on, the younger grandson wanted to spend as much time with us as possible—never knowing if it was the emotional comfort he received from me or the crazy funny things his grandfather did and said to keep him entertained.
Out of necessity and for redirection of his life, he was enrolled at Riverside Military Academy in Georgia in the fall of this year. I expected us to be as “connected” as always and thought I would hear from him routinely—only to be shocked and surprised of his apparent lack of need of our relationship—only two very brief (maybe ten words) emails in four months. Shocked by the fact he had no need to call, text, or email has been devastating for me.
One day I was sharing with my massage therapist, my sweet friend, my grief over lack of contact with him, and she spoke her usual wise insight and wisdom into the situation. Both of us being gardeners, we learn much from cultivating and tilling the soil, and on this particular day she had been working in her garden. When I shared my story she commented, “Sometimes plants and trees have to be left alone to grow deep roots, so they can produce beautiful fruit.”
Deep in my spirit I saw him in a new environment with deep cultivated soil growing a strong foundational root system that would sustain him for the remainder of his life. He doesn’t need me any longer for emotional support for he has to learn to grow up and let go of the old comfortable support system and make it on his own.
All of us have loved ones we have to “let go” for them to find their own way—to grow up and find their destiny. As hard as it to “let go,” we can lovingly trust our heavenly Father to watch over them and bring forth His sovereignty in their lives.
Our responsibility is to saturate them in prayer and bathe them in love as we watch them grow into fine men and women. As they “grow up” and we “let go,” God can bring forth His best in their lives. Make no unrealistic demands on them and watch God weave their lives into a beautiful tapestry full of color and vibrancy taking their unique gifting and creating something beautiful in His time.