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In the midst of a crisis beyond description, depression and hopelessness can take over. With everything in life flipped upside down, it is easy to lose a grip on reality and focus on loss and grief. COVID has brought sickness and death, loss of jobs and income, and national and international uncertainty. I think, if most of us were honest, we would admit these times of great uncertainty would be a great time to reassess our lives and determine what is really important.
Fear and anxiety can be paralyzing and destructive, and many terrifying, physiological symptoms can present with anxiety. Anxiety can be so terrifying you wonder if you will ever be able to function normally again. A combination of depression and anxiety can be debilitating. Maybe some of you reading this post are experiencing some of these symptoms. Symptoms of depression and anxiety are as follows (DSM-5):
Anxiety (generalized anxiety)
If you have any of these symptoms, the following suggestions may be helpful:
SUICIDE IS NOT AN ANSWER!! People love you and you can find a way with God’s help!
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There’s a vulnerability associated with writing that makes me uncomfortable. My personal persona is engaging and extroverted, but in reality, I am a quiet contemplative person who has a strong introverted self. My introverted self refuses to write and speak to a wide audience because I am opinionated and have strong opinions about life. As I look around and witness the demise of our country, culture, politics, and churches, maybe it’s time to speak up, and speak out and address some of these issues. If what I have to say touches or changes one person, or situation, it will be worth the time it took to write.
For those who read and engage with my blog, you may or may not agree with my opinion or assessment of a situation or topic. American culture is so entrenched in the sublime and ridiculous that what I have to say may be offensive to those who are mired in the mud of status quo. America has lost her way and is afloat in a sea of godless stupidity. You don’t have to look far to see it. Check out Washington, DC and the insanity of politics!!
Go to houses of worship where most people dress like they’ve been to a rodeo and moved on to a rock concert. Music that is to usher us into the Presence of the Holy Spirit is so loud and offensive that many attendees stand outside the sanctuary or worse yet, in the parking lot.
Many church members are so fed up with the charade that they don’t go to church anymore.
Pastors have to dress alike and look alike for some ridiculous reason. They are no longer free to be who God created them to be and dress according to their preferences. Pastors and church leadership are so busy trying to be hip and chase down millennials that they have lost their way.
If they sought God as much as they sought millennial attendance, maybe there would be a shift in the American church.
And on the topic of women! Oh, the plight of women from the beginning of time. As a psychologist, I specialized in women’s issues, so I have a lot to say to women of all ages. It is time for all of us to get up and release ourselves from the bondage that most of us have lived in all of our lives. I have A LOT to say to encourage women to live life to the fullest.
Well, my friends, we are off and running. Let’s hope I will push through and regularly write. Send thoughts and comments and let’s dialogue about things that matter to you. If you have a topic you want to address, please let me know.
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Let’s join hands and hearts and take this journey together.
You can find my devotional Whispers of the Spirit on Amazon.
One of the hardest decisions made in a marriage is “when is it time to leave?” One of the difficulties of being a psychologist is staring in the faces of broken people whose lives have been shattered in a relationship. Many people seek counseling to determine if it is time to separate or get a divorce.
A second question is, “when is enough—enough!” What constitutes a valid reason for ending a covenant relationship? God makes it clear in the Bible that He hates divorce; however, that is not all He hates!!
I see men and women who are in abusive destructive relationships that are destroying everyone in the family. When physical and emotional abuse has gone on too long, it is time to leave. When the toxicity of the relationship or the circumstance starts to cause serious health issues, it is time to get out. When you have done all you know to do, and nothing improves, and everything continues to deteriorate and people’s lives are being threatened in whatever way, it is time to leave.
Men and women can stay too long in a dysfunctional relationship, so that by the time they finally do move out and move on they have lost everything—their health, job, finances, children, home, friends, their LIFE!! Living with someone who is mentally ill who refuses to take responsibility for their condition reeks havoc in a family and eventually destroys everyone in the family.
If you have done all you know to do—prayed, sought godly counsel, talked with your parents, sought advice from your physician,a lawyer and other professionals, and try and try again—then it is time to make the hard decision. Leaving should always be the last resort when all else fails, and trying one more time is always good advice unless there is a history of abuse, illegal behavior, repeated moral failure, deception and lying, and/or failure to meet the responsibilities of the family.
Most people know in their “heart of hearts” when it is time to move on. Use great wisdom and much counsel when seeking to end a marriage. A lot is at stake and a lot of people suffer from those decisions; however, there is life after divorce. There is destiny and purpose and opportunity for a wonderful new life. Pray for wisdom to know what to do and how. God will meet you in the midst of your heartbreak and give you great hope and direction.
Moving on can be liberating and life-giving. You can stand on the mountain top and rejoice that God, your Redeemer, has brought you through.
On election day, I thought it would be fitting to write words of encouragement to our divided beloved America–so divided and torn from internal conflict and political division. Maybe I am writing this for myself as I prepare for the results of the election or maybe it is a reminder to each of us that regardless of the outcome–God is sovereign over our nation. According to Scripture, He raises up leaders, often giving nations what they deserve, and deposes leaders.
God is on His eternal throne and makes everything work out according to HIS PLAN. God’s sovereignty covers the earth–for His purposes as He unfolds history–His story, according to His preordained plan. He turns the heart of a nation as He changes the flow of a river.
As a people, we will vote for more of the same, or we will vote for true change! Each of us will make a decision that takes our national forward–according to God’s plan and purposes, and He does as He pleases. Romans 9:15 says, I will show mercy to anyone I choose, and I will show compassion to anyone I choose.
It is my prayer that God will look down and have mercy and compassion on America and bring us repentance and lasting revival we so desperately need–for truly we are a people who “does whatever seems right in our own eyes.” Pray for America that she will once again become a God-fearing nation and have peace she is in the palm of God’s hand.
Several years ago I took a long, but delightful, trip to Melbourne, Australia. I discovered many treasures during my adventure, but one of the most lasting was the “joy of tea time.” A few years later I found myself in Oxford, England enjoying “afternoon tea.” My travels ended in London where I savored “high tea” in a historic hotel close to Buckingham Palace every afternoon.
My trip to England solidified my love of the Brits breathtaking country and their daily ritual of tea time. The joy of tea time allows me to stop to take a breath in a busy day to sip, and sometimes slurp, a hot cup of steaming tea infused with delicate flavor. I often start the day watching the sun rise and sipping a cup of delicious light fragrant tea as the dawn slowly rises across the horizon. As I started this blog, I went through my daily tea ritual and prepared a wonderful cup of Chinese tea. Actually, the name of this tea is called “Joy Tea” which was purchased from a local tea shop, Music City Tea Shop.
Last Christmas my daughter gave me a Chinese cup with a variety of delicious teas purchased from Music City Tea. I enjoyed the tea so much that I decided to go in and experience Chinese tea time and meet Jenny Zhong, the owner of the tea shop. Her shop is located at 113 Murfreesboro Road, STE 401, Franklin, Tennessee. If you have not experienced the “joy of tea time,” I recommend you drop by and see Jenny in person or online at her website www.musiccitytea.com.
There are many benefits to drinking high quality tea, especially green tea, which include:
The wonderful ritual of tea time can add a new dimension to your life as well as many health benefits. I must go now for it is time to make another pot of tea. Let me know if you experience the joy of tea time and share your daily ritual with me and others.
The Good—Part 1
Many years ago an elderly saint told me that life is about relationships. I thought that odd while in my 30’s and couldn’t imagine why relationships were of such great significance. But with an onset of maturity and age, it is much easier to understand why relationships are so important. As a psychologist, I help people unravel the chaos of dysfunctional, miserable, abusive, and unfortunate circumstances surrounding relationships. I would like to take a few minutes to discuss what constitutes good, bad and ugly relationships.
We all long for good relationships and the benefits whereof, but few people seem to have what it takes to make relationships work. Good relationships are established on:
Good relationships require you to go the extra mile and love your friend or relative enough to keep pressing in honest conversation and heart-felt communication. It takes effort by both parties for relationships to work. A one-sided relationship is always dysfunctional.
My sister is a marvelous, godly woman with whom I have a wonderful relationship, but that has not always been the case. Here is brief history about the evolution of our great relationship.
It took my divorce and her divorce before “life” brought us face to face with the need for a relationship—a good relationship. Being the older sister I felt it was my responsibility to make every effort to try and establish a good relationship with my sister. We have pressed through for the past twenty years and have come to the place of a mutually satisfying and genuine friendship and sister relationship. Here are some steps you can take to create mutually satisfying relationships:
I would enjoy hearing about your good relationships and what was necessary to achieve those relationships. What is necessary to create good, healthy relationships?
My name is Dr. Brenda Rambo and I have been a practicing psychologist for over 30 years. I have had the incredible opportunity to meet and work with thousands of people during this time, and have enjoyed a long and successful career covered in God’s grace. As you engage with the content here, it is my hope you will feel like we sat down for a chat and you leave feeling like you’ve learned something and look forward to visiting again soon.
At this juncture of my life, I am making a shift to writing and teaching to encourage people with a message of hope for a more fulfilling life. I’ll be doing this through my blog and books and eventually webinars that cover a range of topics including spiritual growth and hunger for God, psychological and emotional health, healthy relationships, health and wellness and other areas focused on growth and development.
Thank you for dropping by. I look forward to connecting with you and learning more about you as we go along. Feel free to drop me a line at email@example.com and let me know what areas you’d most like to learn about.
This website involves the personal observations of Dr. Brenda Rambo and covers a wide variety of topics: it is intended to be encouraging—and occasionally inspiring—to the reader. Although Dr. Rambo is and has been a practicing licensed psychologist for many years, the statements and observations on the site are all general in nature, and are not intended to be applied as professional advice for any individual or for use in any specific situation. Anyone seeking personal individual advice or counseling of any type is encouraged to contact an appropriate professional for assistance.